I lived in the UK between 1991-1997, moved back to Denmark, and then moved to the UK again in 2006 so this is the third UK election I am witnessing. When I was a kid, there was atime when something like 15 political parties were represented in the Danish parliament. Almost all governments were minority governments and hardly any of them sat for the full four year period possible in Denmark. So I must admit that the “first-past-the-post” system appealed to me the way the winners representation tends to get exaggerated. It is usually the case that the winning party here received less than 50% of the vote, yet it has more than 50% of the representatives. Today I have changed my mind somewhat, a proportional system would be fairer. But just because the system might seem a bit arcane to other Europeans who have never experienced it doesn’t mean that it doesn’t have its merits.

As is usually the case, nothing is black or white…

Staying out of conflicts is what Danes did (I’m not implying that is a bad thing). We sent peacekeeping troops to various places around the world once the conflicts where over or at least that is how it used to be, and it gave me little preparation to the British and their attitude to war. I’m not suggesting the British like war and having soldiers returned in body bags, but having beaten Napoleon, and being on the winning side of both WW I and WW II they consider themselves quite good at it. They even have an “Imperial War Museum”. There is a feeling that despite the setbacks after WW II (losing its empire), it punches above its weight militarily.

Except for the possibility of the cold war turning hot, growing up in Denmark gave me the impression that being a soldier in Western Europe was pretty safe after WW II. So I was very surprised when I learnt that British soldiers have died in combat every year since WW II except for one.

Remembrance Sunday is a ceremony held each year on the Sunday closest to November 11^th, the day when WW I ended and it commemorates the British soldiers that have died in conflicts around the world. Each year as we get close to remembrance Sunday, people buy and wear paper poppies to support the soldiers that have been injured and families that have lost someone who served as a soldier. Almost everyone wears a poppy, even the TV presenters. The poem “In Flanders Fields” refers to the poppies that grew on the graves of those who died on the battlefields of Flanders in WW I which is how the paper poppies of today have come to be used to remember those who have died in conflict.

Unlike for example Denmark, there is no (at least not yet) central register of who lives in the UK and where. And by the way, this article certainly should not be construed as an argument for a central register in the UK.

So how do you prove you live where you claim to live? Easy; the utility bill! You can get this all-important document from a utility such as the water company and the gas and electricity company. Water, gas and electricity are usually supplied to the address where you live; most people would prefer not to pay someone else’s water, gas or electricity. So once you get a bill from one of these companies with your name and address on, life in the UK becomes much easier.

Without the utility bill you may find it very difficult, maybe even impossible to open a bank account, without a bank account it is going to be difficult to be paid at most companies. If you don’t get paid, how will you pay your water, gas or electricity bill?

OK, it is not quite that bad, but it can be rather ridiculous. When we moved to the UK, I called the various utilities to register, not realising how important it was to have the bills issued in both mine and my wife’s names. The local library wouldn’t even issue her with a library card unless she could show them a utility bill. Before we had received a utility bill, we couldn’t get a credit card. Once you have proven once that you live at a particular address, it is usually not a problem to change your address. Nobody asked for a new utility bill when I registered our new address. The previous owner seems to be using that to my great annoyance. He hasn’t lived at my address for more than two years, but recently a lot of letters have arrived addressed to him, and several debt collection agencies have knocked on my door to collect the money he owes. I’m not the only foreigner who is irritated with the importance the utility letter has. There was an article in the Guardian last year on “Our dodgy love affair with utility bills “ and “The belief that a gas bill proves who you are and where you live…”, pointing out how easy it is to fake a utility bill.

So what do you call a person from Northern Ireland? Unless you know for certain, avoid labelling a person from Northern Ireland with any nationality, that is why they’ve been fighting up there! Some years ago I worked with a guy from Northern Ireland who now lived in England, and I once made the mistake of referring to him as being Irish. I didn’t mean to label him as being from the Republic of Ireland. I only meant to make a comment about where he was from geographically. Well, I was told in no uncertain terms that he most definitely was not Irish, he was British!

In reality, the Netherlands is much closer to the UK than to Denmark. Denmark doesn’t even share a border with the Netherlands. Look at the map and notice the two lines going from London to Copenhagen (the capital of Denmark) and from London to Amsterdam (the capital of the Netherlands). While we are dealing with this particular set of misconceptions, Denmark, Norway and Sweden are the countries most often associated with Scandinavia. Some other countries are sometimes included, but the Netherlands never are, unless you are Anglo-Saxon. Yes, the Americans are also clueless in this regard, but as the British are so much closer to each country they have less of an excuse.

I have found that I’m not the first one to comment on this issue, one of my compatriots has her own blog entry about it here.

But most of the relevant websites I have found show how Anglo-Saxons mess it up. So here is another blog welcoming a Dutch Danish company to Toronto. Here’s a person asking for a reference to a Scandinavian (though preferably Danish or Dutch) restaurant. The people behind the Simpsons got it wrong (Little Orphan Millie) though it is of course difficult to know whether that was part of the pun or not). But then there is a person asking (based on the Simpsons episode) what the difference between Danes and the Dutch are. Should I laugh or cry about the person answering that they are both beer drinkers, cheese eaters and (wait for it) Scandinavians?

Used to rain?

First it mentions how the English who are so used to rain woke up to a snowstorm. I have covered that in another blog entry. London has almost 2% more rainy days than Copenhagen. So yes, there was a lot of snow compared to how much usually falls, but I haven’t heard it referred to as a snowstorm over here. But then, the journalist does mention that her source is “The Sun“, a newspaper given to exaggerations and even fabricated stories.

Double-decker buses?

Oh, and all the double-decker buses are at a standstill according to the article. In that case it is not as bad as I thought then, all the non-double-decker buses are still driving then I assume. Yes, there are non-double-decker buses in London.

The issue seems to be causing the Labour government some problems as Gordon Brown, the Prime Minister, at a party conference in 2007 uttered the slogan: “”. According to both the BBC and “The Times”, the “National Front” (a right wing whites-only political party) has used the same slogan. According to The Times, when Downing Street (where the prime minister lives, referring to Downing Street is comparable to referring to “The White House” in the US) was confronted with this, their response was that Gordon Brown used the slogan first but as The Times points out, that doesn’t necessarily make it any better.

This morning I had to go from our village into Wokingham, a short distance of less than 3 miles/5 km and I was again reminded of how bad traffic is at the wrong time of day. The wrong time of day is unfortunately quite along time. Almost all of those 3 miles were spent starting and stopping and crawling along at a snails pace. I am usually able to work from home so that traffic doesn’t affect me, but it is not always possible to avoid. If I’m going into London by car, I usually have to double the amount of time that my Sat Nav/GPS tells me it will take. Taking the train isn’t always possible. If I arrive at the train station car park later than 9:30 it will be full, so even if I want to take the train it won’t be possible. Sometimes it seems like they’ve just given up on even attempting to improve the transport infrastructure in the UK.

I survive by living outside the M25 (a motorway encircling all of London, some call it the UK’s biggest car park), often working from home and not having too many meetings in London.

In series 10, episode 5 of Top Gear, they made a race across London by bicycle, boat, public transportation and of course a car. According to my Sat Nav, the distance they travelled is 16.5 miles/26.5 km. Again according to the Sat Nav, it should take 53 minutes by car and 1 hour 18 minutes by bike. I suggest you see the episode yourself, it is 22 minutes long and I won’t spoil the fun by telling you who was first.